Skip to main content

Fly Baby Fly

I told you my mania would die. As August ends so does my mania and so does my energy. And now i find myself lying here on a Friday because of this hurricane that closed work waking up from a nice nap and talking to a few friends on messenger.
I had some very vivid dreams which is no doubt a side effect of the drugs i am on but the good news is i am sleeping and dreaming again. Mania is a fun friend, it creates some beautifully dramatic pieces of inspiration that you want to hold on to forever because for a momeny in time you felt the best you will feel for a while. Your energy was sky high, your motivation was through the roof and your confidence was beyond hesitation.
Now its back to reality and i have to find that motivation to keep moving along at an even keeled pace and not slow down even though my body is dragging and relentlessly and tirelessly wants sleep. I have to fight the urge to stay cuddled up in my blankets 24/7 and fight for my goals and fight for my dreams.
This is my chance to recreate my life and redesign it the way i want it to be and this is the year i will challenge myself to go above and beyond my own expectations. I will exceed my limitations and i will push my own boundaries to excell beyond my potential. I am ready to fly baby fly!
Just because i am not in the mood or i am not feeling it, i am not going to let that stand in my way. I have my suppory sysytem. I have my medication. I have my therapy. I have my psychiatrist. I have all the right things in all the right places and most importantly i have God.
If you are a praying person, pray that i follow His will for my life and that He opens doors for me and closes doors for me according to His will because that is how He will bless me and i want Him to bless me!
Stay safe during this hurricane Dorian!

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

2016

When i was on my way to Eastern Va medical institute i distinctly remember after they let me out of the emergency vehicle and unchained me, i knelt down to tie my shoes tighter. I was preparing for a marathon. I did not know what i was gearing up for but i was gearing up! They led me into the wait room. I sat there pacing back and forth. Then started doing jumping jacks. Then push ups. Then the guy next to me started asking me questions so i started talking to him. He said he was sent here because he got in trouble for going to a party and getting busted for weed. That was the first time i questioned why i was there. They called my name and i was led to the back. They took my weight and blood pressure and then told me if anyone asks i am there for a period study. So i literally thought i was there for a period study. I was then led into a big room that was an activity room but reminded me of the tv set orange is the new black for God knows what reason... No one was in the room at t...
Post a Comment
Read more

Don't try to date me

If you want to date me you have big shoes to fill. My ex husband was amazing and i will compare you to him and you will most likely fail. So dont try. I am not looking to date. So dont try. I am at a point in my life where i am trying very hard to focus on my career and friendships. I want to build friendships that will last a lifetime. I want to nourish them and watch them grow. I spent all of my early years chasing boys and now i am chasing girls for friendships. I want to have a group of frienda that i can lean on and count on and that can count on me. That is my goal. Dating is my last priority. So seriously if you are trying to date me don't. Chances are i am not interested. Or i maybe interested but i see your interactions with other women and that ship doesnt sail with me. I want to feel one of a kind and special. I want to feel like you picked me out of a crowded room and i was the one you pursued. If you are flirting with multiple women your chances are zero. I am not...
Post a Comment
Read more

The Power of a Testimony

Its hard to understand why i am going through what i am going through right now. For the past 3 years things have only been going up for me and i have only been getting stronger. I have been hit with some pretty hard turbulence this year that couldve made my life rocky and hard but instead i allowed it to mold me and shape me into a stronger person. Every thing was going so well.... Then Monday hit, and it hit me hard. Like a bulldozer carrying thousands of pounds of wet concrete ready to pour over my life and bury me alive. It broke me down. It tore into me like i havent experienced in a very long time. I cried out to God. I didnt blame Him, instead i praised Him. I thanked Him for my life but i asked Him why is this happening to me? Then i read the story of Job. You see, my blogs would be pointless and serve absolutely no purpose if i didnt go through my fair share of trials too. Mental illness does not mean smooth sailing. There is no magic pill and then you are cured of every ail...
Post a Comment
Read more